I've pondered that question a lot in the last several months. "What's the very BEST part about ME right NOW?" Because life is ever-changing, the answer will also be ever-changing. I'm sure that my answer to this question will always revolve around certain powerful forces that influence my life, such as: family, friends, faith, music, laughter, and talents. In August, my answer to that question was feeling Josh's evident love for me. In September, the answer was experiencing life in my new home with my family. In October, the answer was sharing love with my friends.
For weeks and weeks now, I've had an innate desire to be around my friends. I love being around people that make me smile, people that make me laugh, people that make me feel better about myself just by being with them. Some of my favorite times with friends are spent doing nothing--simply just sitting, talking, eating, and laughing. It is time spent just enjoying being together.
Two weeks ago at MOPS, the question was asked "what makes you resiliant as a mother?" My response to that was that I take care of my needs so that I can handle my children's needs; and presently, my needs are to get out of the home frequently (at least once a week) to be with friends. Every other mother in the group responded that they feel guilty when they leave the house to have a good time with their friends, so they rarely do it. I don't feel guilty at all--I feel better about myself. I've known for a while that I'm different from a lot of stay-home moms because of this. I know that I have been given much: a fantastic husband who has a stable job, four healthy and beautiful boys, a home that supplies our physical needs. I know that my life is wonderful and I'm truly blessed. But I also know myself well enough to recognize symptomatic warning signs that let me know that I'm suffering and I need to take care of me by doing things that create inner happiness.
I am blessed to have a husband who is supportive of me, and who recognizes that I am a happier wife and mother after I've been able to get out and feed my soul. He gives me freedom; he allows me to leave to go be with my friends. And I always come home feeling more love for him and for my children, because I return home feeling better about myself and my life. It's amazing how that works every time!!!
My current choice in friends perhaps may appear unconventional--a single man, a teenage girl, a married woman living apart from her husband. But, to be clear, I don't choose friends who are the same age as me, or who are in the same phase of life as me, or who are the same "stereotype" as me. I choose friends who bring out the best in me, who accept me for the crazy person that I am, and who are open and honest with me. I love to be around people who know themselves and are unafraid to be who they are and who are comfortable in their own skin. I love to be with others who also love to laugh, love to joke, and love to enjoy the simple things in life.
One Sunday in October, I spent the afternoon with Kimi and Kerry, sisters who fight constantly like cats and dogs, but both of which whom I love to be with! We celebrated Kerry's 20th birthday, and then Kerry, Kimi, and I got silly and colored each other's toes. It was the perfect example of time spent doing nothing, but time not wasted. I enjoyed the simplicity of being with them, of doing a silly activity together, and of laughing the whole time!
What's the best part about YOU right now?
1 comment:
Kayla - I loved this post!! You have really just answered a prayer for me in your statement that you are so blessed, but recognize symptoms that you need to start taking care of yourself. There is something that I have wanted to do for a long time, but can't because kids/house/RS always come first, and it's something that's just for ME. You have given me "permission" to do it, and I won't feel bad about it! Thank you!
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